Commandments for a Healthy Relationship

We should know and understand that love is not just about finding the right person, but creating the right relationship.  It’s not about how much love you have in the beginning, but how much love you build until the end.  A relationship to be successful should be healthy, caring, loving, kind, upbeat, and positive.  It should make your smile a little wider and your life a little brighter. Happiness, health personal relationships are one of the greatest joys of life and here are some of the significant points who should bear in mind  both partners.

I.  We will remember that every person and relationship is different.

People don’t fall in love with what makes you the same; they fall in love with what makes you different.  Be your imperfectly perfect self.  We are not perfect for everyone, we are only perfect for those select few people that really take the time to get to know us and love us for who we really are.  And to those select few, being our imperfectly perfect self is what they love most about us.

Don’t compare your relationship to anyone else’s – not your parent’s, friend’s, coworker’s, or that random couple whose relationship seems perfect.  Every couple makes their own love rules, love agreements, and love habits.  Just focus on you two, and making your relationship the best it can be.

II.  We will listen to each other openly, without judgment.

It’s far too easy to look at someone and make a snap judgment about them.  But you’d be amazed at the pain and tears a smile hides.  What a person shows to the public is only a small fraction of the iceberg hidden from sight.  And more often than not, it’s lined with cracks and scars that run all the way to the foundation of their soul.

Never judge.  Learn to respect and acknowledge the feelings of your significant other.  Pay close attention to them.  Be present.  We don’t always need advice.  Sometimes all we need is a hand to hold, an ear to listen, and a heart to understand.  There is a time to speak out and a time to remain silent.  True wisdom comes from knowing the difference.  And this difference can make or break a healthy relationship.  

III.  We will say what we mean and mean what we say.

Share what is going on in your mind and heart.  Share your deepest thoughts, needs, wishes, hopes, and dreams.  Open communication and honesty is vital tohealthy relationships.  Give the people in your life the information they need, rather than expecting them to know the unknowable.

Information is the grease that keeps the engine of communication running.  Start communicating clearly.  Don’t try to read other people’s minds, and don’t make other people, especially your significant other, try to read yours.

IV.  We will support each other through good times and bad.

Be there through the good, bad, happy, and sad times – no matter what.  Be willing to provide a listening ear, a hug, and emotional support in all circumstances.  Trust that you can count on each other, and be available not only when it’s convenient, but when you need each other the most.

V.  We will be loyal.

True love and real friendship aren’t about being inseparable.  These relationships are about two people being true to each other even when they are separated.  When it comes to relationships, remaining faithful is never an option, but a priority.  Loyalty is everything.

VI.  We will live by the truth.

Inner peace is being able to rest at night knowing you haven’t used or taken advantage of anyone to get to where you are in life.  Lies run sprints, but the truth runs marathons.  Run a marathon.  Live so that when others think of fairness, integrity and reliability, they think of you. 

VII.  We will spend quality time with each other.

Make time for each other.  With our busy schedules we often forget to relax and enjoy the great company we have.  In human relationships distance is not measured in miles, but in affection.  Two people can be right next to each other, yet miles apart.  So don’t ignore someone you care about, because lack of concern hurts more than angry words

Carve out special time for just the two of you once a week.  Do something fun.  Spend time together talking, going on dates, and making each other laugh.  Not only is it true that laughter is the best medicine, but it’s also true that shared laughter can make a good relationship great.

VIII.  We will appreciate each other and help each other grow.

Having an appreciation for how amazing your significant other is leads to good places – productive, fulfilling, peaceful places.  So be happy for them when they’re making progress.  Cheer for their victories.  Celebrate their accomplishments, and encourage their goals and ambitions.  Challenge them to be the best they can be.  And be thankful for their blessings, openly.

IX.  We will settle disputes peacefully.

Not much is worth fighting about.  Heated arguments are a waste of time.  If you can avoid it, don’t fight.  Step back from arguments with your loved ones.

When you feel anger surging up and you want to yell that vulgar remark on tip of your tongue, just close your mouth and walk away.  Don’t let your anger get the best of you.  You don’t have to be right or win an argument.  It just doesn’t matter that much.  Give yourself some time to calm down and then gently discuss the situation.

X.  We will love and respect ourselves as individuals too.

Our first and last love is self-love.  Don’t rely on your significant other, or anyone else, for your happiness and self worth.  Only you can be responsible for that.  If you can’t love and respect yourself, no one else will be able to either.

Accept who you are completely – the good and the bad.  And make changes in your life as YOU see fit – not because you think anyone else wants you to be different, but because you know it’s the right thing to do, for you. 

21 Quick Tricks to Feel Better Instantly

When life gets stressful and you feel like you’re losing your emotional balance, use one or more of these simple tricks to help you relax your mind and re-center yourself in an instant.

1. Wash your hands and face, and brush your teeth. – The simple act of cleaning these parts of your body is both reinvigorating and relaxing, and gives you that ‘fresh start’ feeling.
2. Change your socks for refreshment. – It’s an odd trick, but it works.  Bring a change of socks to work, and change your socks midway through the day.  You’ll be amazed at how much fresher you’ll feel.  This trick is especially handy on days with lots of walking.
3. Call a close friend. – Sometimes a quick conversation with someone you care about is just what you need to boost your mood.
4. Stretch. – When you feel yourself getting stressed, get up, reach towardthe sky, bend down and touch your toes, twist your torso from side to side – stretch it out.
5. Go outdoors. – Getting some fresh air outdoors is always a good way to rouse your senses and clear your mind.
6. Take light exercise break. – Do a few sets of jumping jacks to get your blood moving, or take a walk.  Even the slightest bit of exercise can reduce momentary stress and re-energize your mind.  
7. Dress to feel your best. – When we know we are looking our best, we naturally feel better.
8. Listen to your favorite music. – If it’s not too much of a distraction, listening to your favorite upbeat music can be a great way to boost your spirits.
9. Watch or read something that inspires you. – Sometimes all you need is a little pep talk.  Watch a motivational video or read something that inspires you.
10. Have a good laugh. – Watch a funny video clip or read your favorite comic strip.  A good chuckle will stimulate your mind, giving you a renewed sense of optimism.
11. Take a few really deep, controlled breaths. – Deep breathing helps reduce stress, a source of fatigue, and increases the level of oxygen in the blood.  Techniques can be as simple as inhaling for five seconds, holding your breath for four seconds and exhaling for four seconds.  You can also try more elaborate techniques which require different positions
12. Clear your stuffed nose. – If allergies have your sinuses blocked, you may be feeling more tired and cranky.  Rinse your nasal passages with saline solution.
13. Cook a tasty meal. – Even if you are by yourself, preparing a tasty dinner, setting the table, and treating yourself to a wonderful culinary experience will lift your spirits.  Sharing it with someone you love or respect will make it even more nurturing.
14. Walk away from energy vampires. – Energy vampires are people who always have something to complain about, or a problem that needs to be fixed, and they’ll drain your energy by making you listen to them about their problems or by giving them attention.
15. Complete an important piece of unfinished business. – Today is a perfect day to finish what you started.  Few feelings are more satisfying than the one you get after an old burden has been lifted off of your shoulders.  
16. Work on something that’s meaningful to you. – Engage yourself in a meaningful personal project.  Or pull the trigger on doing something you’ve wanted to do for a long time, but haven’t yet had the resolve to do.
17. Assist someone in need. – In life, you get what you put in.  When you make a positive impact in someone else’s life, you also make a positive impact in your own life.  Do something that’s greater than you, something that helps someone else to be happy or to suffer less.  I promise, it will be an extremely rewarding experience.
18. Think about your latest (or greatest) success. – Think about it for at least sixty seconds.  Taking in your success as often as possible will help you reach it again and again.  Quite simply, it reminds you that if you’ve done it before, you can do it again.
19. Act like today is already an awesome day. – Do so, and it will be.  Research shows that although we think that we act because of the way we feel, in fact, we often feel because of the way we act.  A great attitude always leads to great experiences.
20. Notice what’s right. – Everything that happens in life is neither good nor bad.  It just depends on your perspective.  And no matter how it turns out, it always ends up just the way it should.  Either you succeed or you learn something.  So stay positive, appreciate the pleasant outcomes, and learn from the rest. 
21. Take a moment to acknowledge how far you’ve come. – Look around you, remember that you started with nothing, and know that everything you see, you created. We can all lose our feelings of self-worth, especially when something goes wrong in our world. The truth is that if you have done it before, you can do it again, no matter what.